5 WAYS TO CULTIVATE AUTHENTIC friendships

One day, my oldest daughter told me she wanted to set me up on (what she called) a "Blind Friend Date." She said she had a co-worker whom she wanted me to meet. I must say, I was a little skeptical about meeting new people. I had become set in my ways.

However, being without friends came with its share of problems. For instance, I had forgotten how to have girl talks. I would catch myself feeling sad at times. I never gave thought to it being from me isolating myself.

Knowing that the space I created for myself was slowly causing me to decline physically, mentally, and spiritually was weighing on me. Now that I'm on a journey to live authentically, I am more aware of my situation. 
 
​I know now that authentic friendships are vital for mental and emotional well-being. They provide us with a sense of belonging, support, and joy. Here are five ways I learned to cultivate genuine, lasting friendships. 

1. Be Genuine and Vulnerable

​ Authentic friendships are built on trust and mutual understanding. To cultivate such connections, it's crucial to be your true self. Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences honestly. Vulnerability can be intimidating, but it's the key to forming deep connections. When you allow others to see your true self, it encourages them to do the same, creating a strong foundation of trust and authenticity.

• Practice active listening: Pay close attention to your friends' words and emotions. Show empathy and understanding, making them feel heard and valued. 
• Share your struggles: Don't be afraid to talk about your challenges and insecurities. This openness can strengthen your bond and foster a deeper connection. Avoid pretending to be someone you're not to fit in.

2. Invest Time and Effort

​Building and maintaining authentic friendships requires time and effort. Make an active effort to stay in touch, meet regularly, and engage in meaningful activities together. Quality time spent with friends can create lasting memories and strengthen your relationship. 

• Schedule regular meet-ups: Whether it's a weekly coffee date or a monthly dinner, having a consistent plan to meet can help keep the friendship alive.
• Show up: Be there for your friends during both good and bad times. Your presence during difficult moments can solidify your bond and demonstrate your commitment to the friendship.​

3. Communicate Openly and Honestly

Clear and honest communication is the backbone of any authentic friendship. Discuss your feelings, expectations, and boundaries openly. Address conflicts promptly and respectfully to prevent misunderstandings and resentment from building up.

• Practice assertiveness: Express your needs and feelings clearly without being aggressive or passive. This approach fosters respect and understanding.
• Be a good listener: Encourage your friends to share their thoughts and feelings, and listen without judgment. This creates a safe space for open dialogue.

4. Be Supportive and Reliable

​Reliability and support are crucial components of authentic friendships. Show your friends that they can count on you by being consistent, dependable, and supportive.

• Celebrate their successes: Share in your friends' joys and achievements. Your genuine happiness for their successes can strengthen your bond.
• Offer a helping hand: Be there to support your friends during challenging times. Whether it's offering advice, a listening ear, or practical help, your support can make a significant difference.

5. Engage in Shared Interests and Activities

​Common interests and activities can deepen your connection with friends and create opportunities for shared experiences.  Engaging in hobbies, sports, or other interests together can bring joy and strengthen your friendship.

• Join clubs or groups: Participate in clubs, groups, or classes that align with your interests. This can introduce you to like-minded individuals and create opportunities for new friendships.
• Plan activities together: Organize events or outings that you and your friends enjoy. Shared experiences can create lasting memories and reinforce your bond.

Conclusion

Cultivating authentic friendships takes time, effort, and a willingness to be open and vulnerable. By being genuine, investing time, communicating openly, being supportive, and engaging in shared interests, you can build deep, meaningful connections that enrich your life. Authentic friendships are a treasure, providing joy, support, and a sense of belonging. Start today by taking small steps towards nurturing these valuable relationships in your life.