Turns Out I Wasn’t Tired. I Was Thirsty

I’ve had this conversation with myself more times than I’d like to admit:

Why am I so tired?

For a long time, my answer was just: I’m just getting older; I'm in the thick of hormonal changes; of course I’m tired. Of course my brain feels slower some days. I filed it under “things I can’t control” and moved on with my coffee in hand.

Here’s the part that makes this a little embarrassing: I should have known better. I worked in healthcare for over 20 years, and one of my main jobs was keeping my residents hydrated. I knew exactly what to look for — in the skin, in the eyes, in the way someone’s thinking got a little slower or a little off. I could spot it in someone else from across the room. I knew that dehydration in the brain is everything.

But somehow it never occurred to me that the same thing was happening to me. And the cruel little trick of it is, the less water I drank, the more I forgot to drink water. It wasn’t a conscious choice — it was just this quiet slide where the less hydrated I got, the less I remembered that hydration was even the thing to think about.

So it took me embarrassingly long to consider something so simple, something I used to teach other people about every single day. I wasn’t drinking enough water. And even knowing what I knew professionally, I still don’t think I understood why it mattered so much for me personally until I went looking.

The Thing I Didn’t Know I Didn’t Know

Here’s what I found, and what genuinely surprised me: estrogen has a hand in how our bodies hold onto water. It helps regulate a hormone that tells our kidneys how much fluid to keep versus let go. So as estrogen drops during perimenopause and menopause, that regulation gets shakier.

We become more prone to dehydration — and dehydration wears a lot of the same disguises we already blame on “getting older.” Fatigue. Fog. Headaches. Feeling short-fused. Even some of the flushed, overheated feeling that gets lumped in with hot flashes.

I read that and just sat there for a second. All this time I’d been treating my low estrogen as an inevitable cost of aging, and some real portion of it might have just been… thirst I wasn’t noticing.

Because that’s the other thing — apparently our thirst signal gets quieter as we age too. So by the time I actually felt thirsty, I was probably already running on empty for a while. No wonder the coffee wasn’t fixing it. I wasn’t dehydrated in a dramatic, obvious way. I was just quietly, chronically a little short on water, day after day, without any siren going off to tell me.

Where I Am With It Now

I wish I could tell you I’ve cracked it. I haven’t, not fully. What I can tell you is I’ve started paying attention in a way I never did before.

I even downloaded an app — it’s called Waterllama, and yes, it’s exactly as silly and endearing as it sounds — that nudges me through the day when I’ve gone too long without a sip. I didn’t think I’d need something like that. Twenty years in healthcare, and here I am needing a cartoon llama to remind me to drink water. But it works, so I’m not too proud to use it.

I started putting a glass  next to the coffee maker now. Some mornings I actually drink it before I even turn the coffee on. Other mornings I walk right past it, and by the time I notice the fog rolling back in a couple hours later, I already know why.

I’ve started adding a little lemon or cucumber sometimes. Turns out I'd stopped liking the taste of plain water somewhere along the way  — I just kept not finishing the glass. I also had to find a way to keep my electrolytes in order. Because I found out plain water on its own can actually dehydrate you if you're not replacing what you're losing along with it. Here’s a great diy for Organic Coconut Water; it’s my go-to.

What’s shifted: I was sick of being tired all the time. I stopped assuming my tiredness was from getting older without asking a few honest questions first. Have I had water today?

I’m Not Saying This Fixes Everything

This isn't a cure, and I know menopause doesn't just resolve because I'm drinking more water. But it bugs me a little that something this basic sat right in front of me for so long and I missed it — after twenty years of watching for it in other people, no less.

I'm still not consistent. I still catch myself reaching for coffee first out of habit.  But on the days I do remember, I actually notice the difference by how much clearer my head feels.

If your energy's been off and you've already ruled out the usual suspects, add water to the list.

It surprised me how much it mattered.

I’d love to know — is this something you’ve noticed too, or is it just me? Tell me in the comments.